I'd like to say, "and good riddance" but really, I feel like a college freshman going into sophomore year. I've gotten through the first round, but there is still a long road ahead, and I have no idea what the rest of this ride is going to entail. I've been through just enough to dissolve most of my pre-conceived notions about what pregnancy would be like, but not enough to build a better expectation.
1. This past Monday was my 11-week appointment. All was well, and it was uneventful. Somehow, I managed not to gain any weight, despite eating constantly (and yes, holding it down, too). I shaved my legs in vain, and I am NOT complaining about it! Apparently, the next appointment will be much like this one.
2. I have a baby bump. David noticed it just yesterday, and he's been rather excited about it. I am at an awkward stage where my clothes don't quite fit correctly, but I'm no where near my maternity clothes size. I'm hoping to find and dig out my maxi dresses from last summer to wear, but haven't located them in the building yet. Apparently, according to David's mom and little brother, I "look pregnant" even in how I stand and walk already. I hope this isn't a sign of a weak back and is just my body adjusting to its new role as a human incubator.
3. Lauren and I have begun to exercise together. Our "stage 1" is a brisk, 2-mile walk. So far, we've had some lovely adventures on our walks. The first one was when Lauren spotted a vaccine bottle on the side of the road. We are near a veterinary clinic, so we assumed it was some kind of dog vaccine and determined to learn more about our find. In fact, it was a conjugate to a meningitis vaccine, and had no business being outside of a landfill. It must have fallen off of the garbage truck, because there is no reason for anyone traveling that road to have one of those. The second discovery was made by Lauren as well, as I almost stepped on it. It was a baby king snake. He was sunning himself in the middle of the road. I poked him with a stick to get him to bite it (odd hobby, I know) and Jeremy picked him up and took him home to help keep the compost pile clean. We hope to see him again sometime, grown up and fat with pests.
4. So, sorry, no mood swings to report. Really, so far I've gotten a little snippy, and occasionally I will voice some opinionated blurbs to David, but I haven't gone all "crazy preggo" just yet. Maybe I should stage one? I really just don't want to be hurtful in the words I say. I'm okay with "feeling" hormonally emotional, as long as I maintain my composure and treat people with the same kindness that I would like to see from them.
5. Finally, I've decided that I would like to try to read more. I have enjoyed different kinds of relaxing lately and hope to maybe lay out in the sun or on my bed and add more reading and writing (that are not work-related) to my platter. And please pray for me--it is a decently full and occasionally overwhelming platter.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Imparting maturity
Now that I'm heading rapidly in the direction of parenthood, I'm wondering what goals parenthood should have. Is it to keep the kid alive and in possession of its limbs until it can go off and repeat the process? Is it to create a prepared and acclimated member of the culture, so that when you "release it into the wild" it can do well?
Among these thoughts is the idea of maturity. I've been evaluating my own maturity as well as what the goal of maturity is in evaluating progress into adulthood. I've never really thought of myself as much of an adult, though I've usually assumed myself to be more mature than most. This has backfired into humiliation a time or two, and I've looked back to see that I spent much of my life playacting maturity in order to seem superior to these odd creatures, these "other kids my age" with whom I rarely interacted. So, I traded this cultural comparison for one a little less nebulous.
Paul almost interrupts the most famous text on love ever written with this description (1 Cor. 13:11):
When I was a child,
I spoke like a child,
I thought like a child,
I reasoned like a child.
When I became a man,
I put aside childish things.
This is a little more of what I was looking for. The context is incredible--instead of trying to get an idea of what love "is" in a futile description of an emotion that changes from person to person, it instead describes what love does. This verse transitions from describing love to describing growth, then the chapter ends with the idea that faith, hope, and love remain, even though we only see God and these things like we're looking into a scratched mirror.
So, maturity can be put into three distinct categories: speech, thought, and reasoning. We often laugh at or even delight in the simplicity of childlike minds...when they are present in children. But in adults, we expect a development of selflessness, understanding, and communication that goes beyond what children naturally do.
Paul isn't simply talking about the human experience here, though. He's encouraging the Corinthians to grow up and put aside their childish pursuit of their own lusts and inclinations and aspire to this more mature, selfless love. And really, that's how I'd sum up maturity. Selfless love that desires what's best (not just what feels best) for others. You can see it demonstrated in speech, thought, and reasoning, as well as any other aspect of life--priorities, actions, what have you.
So then....how to make this happen? How do you get from childish selfishness to mature, selfless love? I think the example of Christ is an immense picture of ultimate selfless love, and we can mirror it in our day-to-day actions and setting of priorities. But in the end, the heart is His to change. We can work along with Him toward the goal, but without His enabling power, we are hopeless to attain this change on our own. It's not just about actions and motives, it's also about strengthening our relationship with Him as well as with those around us.
Which means I'm not going to arrive today. Drat.
Among these thoughts is the idea of maturity. I've been evaluating my own maturity as well as what the goal of maturity is in evaluating progress into adulthood. I've never really thought of myself as much of an adult, though I've usually assumed myself to be more mature than most. This has backfired into humiliation a time or two, and I've looked back to see that I spent much of my life playacting maturity in order to seem superior to these odd creatures, these "other kids my age" with whom I rarely interacted. So, I traded this cultural comparison for one a little less nebulous.
Paul almost interrupts the most famous text on love ever written with this description (1 Cor. 13:11):
When I was a child,
I spoke like a child,
I thought like a child,
I reasoned like a child.
When I became a man,
I put aside childish things.
This is a little more of what I was looking for. The context is incredible--instead of trying to get an idea of what love "is" in a futile description of an emotion that changes from person to person, it instead describes what love does. This verse transitions from describing love to describing growth, then the chapter ends with the idea that faith, hope, and love remain, even though we only see God and these things like we're looking into a scratched mirror.
So, maturity can be put into three distinct categories: speech, thought, and reasoning. We often laugh at or even delight in the simplicity of childlike minds...when they are present in children. But in adults, we expect a development of selflessness, understanding, and communication that goes beyond what children naturally do.
Paul isn't simply talking about the human experience here, though. He's encouraging the Corinthians to grow up and put aside their childish pursuit of their own lusts and inclinations and aspire to this more mature, selfless love. And really, that's how I'd sum up maturity. Selfless love that desires what's best (not just what feels best) for others. You can see it demonstrated in speech, thought, and reasoning, as well as any other aspect of life--priorities, actions, what have you.
So then....how to make this happen? How do you get from childish selfishness to mature, selfless love? I think the example of Christ is an immense picture of ultimate selfless love, and we can mirror it in our day-to-day actions and setting of priorities. But in the end, the heart is His to change. We can work along with Him toward the goal, but without His enabling power, we are hopeless to attain this change on our own. It's not just about actions and motives, it's also about strengthening our relationship with Him as well as with those around us.
Which means I'm not going to arrive today. Drat.
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
10 weeks and all's well
The first trimester has not at all been as terrifying as I expected. I haven't been horribly nauseated, due to equal parts of eating constantly and taking oodles of prenatal vitamins. I haven't been horribly fatigued, though I have taken to sleeping in when I can; and I've noticed I can't push as much in the physical activity department. I haven't noticed any major mood swings, just mild PMS-like snippy-ness.
I have an OB appointment next week, and I'm hoping to have supplemental insurance by then. We are going to have a doozy of a time paying for this if it all doesn't go through. Pray please that this happens quickly and smoothly.
Honestly, the biggest drag is that I'm sick of eating. I don't like that it takes so much time to prepare, eat, and clean up food every day.
On a more minor note, it appears I have no brain. I even fuzzed in the middle of typing that sentence and wondered, "now what was I going to mention? Stupid brain. Oh! That's what it was." No wonder kids think their parents are brain dead. Apparently we are! When we got my maternity clothes, we bought them at half price. My family got a kick out of having me do the mental calculations to let them know how much we actually spent. "What's half of $7?" "Uh.....2....$3.50?"
Bright side now: We are having a great time growing through this time together. David and I are doing what we love and preparing to add another love into that. Our biggest unknown is finances. We'll see how things go in the next few months. At this point, we're being well taken care of, and we're happy to enjoy our lives and our work and our church.
And I need to eat again.
I have an OB appointment next week, and I'm hoping to have supplemental insurance by then. We are going to have a doozy of a time paying for this if it all doesn't go through. Pray please that this happens quickly and smoothly.
Honestly, the biggest drag is that I'm sick of eating. I don't like that it takes so much time to prepare, eat, and clean up food every day.
On a more minor note, it appears I have no brain. I even fuzzed in the middle of typing that sentence and wondered, "now what was I going to mention? Stupid brain. Oh! That's what it was." No wonder kids think their parents are brain dead. Apparently we are! When we got my maternity clothes, we bought them at half price. My family got a kick out of having me do the mental calculations to let them know how much we actually spent. "What's half of $7?" "Uh.....2....$3.50?"
Bright side now: We are having a great time growing through this time together. David and I are doing what we love and preparing to add another love into that. Our biggest unknown is finances. We'll see how things go in the next few months. At this point, we're being well taken care of, and we're happy to enjoy our lives and our work and our church.
And I need to eat again.
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